godwhisperer | (no subject)

(no subject)

When: Friday, after the trial
Where: Sonia's room
Who: Gundam and Sonia
Why: Serious discussions

[Gundam is truly exhausted, more than he's felt in years. Making the decision he made was difficult, and then it all fell apart on him, turned out to be wrong. He's no longer angry at anyone else, not really, but he feels foolish and confused. While his anger kept him going through the end of the trial, once Kaoru was revealed, it has all burnt out now and he just wants to hide in his room.

But Sonia did want to talk to him, and he feels obligated to allow her to do so. After all, while he's not entirely pleased with what she did, she did what she did to save him and she was successful. He owes her that much.

So once he leaves the drawing room, he will go to her room and wait for whenever she returns.]

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I am... thankful to be here, because it has allowed me to meet you. I have never had... true friends, and, really, I have never even looked forward that much to my own future...

[ Her gaze seems somewhere distant, before it clears; she locks her fingers with his. ]

But you have given me what I did not have before. And so... thank you... from the bottom of my heart.

...

[He goes quiet as she speaks, contemplative. Because she has to know his situation is no different. But he didn't really imagine that all the time he was hoping to have someone in his life, he could be that person for someone else.]

I...I have been alone a long time as well. You see, I swore off mankind and became evil, rejecting all of my ties with humanity. [It turns out when he says he is evil, that's literally all he means.] But even though it is difficult and I'm not very practiced at this, I am glad to no longer be evil.

I...you did refuse to allow that, and I am happy for that. So it is not a matter which requires thanks.

[ It's true that it does take one to know one; even if their reasons and upbringings were wildly different, their situations were similar, and Sonia doesn't need to pry very deeply to know that. Maybe it was the fact that he wore his loneliness on the outside, covering it up with theatrics, that drew her in the first place. ]

...That is right. I cannot allow you to be alone any more.

It shall be a... a v...vow between you and I.

[ It's strange then; she looks almost a little sad. It's bittersweet. It takes her a moment to realize her eyes are stinging. Not wanting to explain why and wanting to forget the reason they are misting over, she leans forward and kisses him. ]

[He doesn't miss the hesitation in her tone, and he's not stupid, either. He understands she's planning to risk her life this week, either through a confrontation with the Mastermind or a plot. But he would be a hypocrite if he tried to stop her, so he won't comment on it.

But it is a little painful, to hear her make that vow she will be unable to keep. Instead of responding, he kisses her back.]

[ She is going to make a lot of decisions this week she is not going to expect his forgiveness for. But she hopes- she can only hope blindly, desperately- that he could perhaps keep such a vow not for her, but for himself. It is her greatest hope that he should live in the light, not the darkness. If such a thing could happen, then she doesn't need his forgiveness; she may not even deserve it.

But right now, there is no plan to conceive or murder to commit, and she wants the moment to last. Even when she pulls back she doesn't pull away entirely; after breaking off the kiss she rests her head against his chest, just listening to his heartbeat, and trying not to think about the oncoming week. ]

[He couldn't fall asleep if he wanted to, but he'll lie still and quiet for now. It's not that he's angry. He understands why she's doing it, and he can live through it. But it all feels a little unfair, to become attached to someone only to lose them.]

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